Etties

Geographically, North Chicago has all four of the seasons. I don't particularly care for the winter. I can deal with the other three a lot easier. I think that came from having an outhouse as a kid– and having to go to the bathroom at two or three o'clock in the morning. And at that time there was still fox coming around. And rodents in the outhouse. I learned how to burn paper in the outhouse and I learned how animals don't like fire. 

North Chicago is almost like a school. You learn this, you learn that. And if you stay open, you usually get a chance to see more than one way of life. You can look at your friend. I have a friend, she don't ever want a house. I said, you don't want a house!? "No, I don't wanna have to cut grass. I don't want to do all that. I just pay my rent and the people clean the hallways.” To me, to have your own house– walk around naked– it's your house! You know, you never wanted to just get up, lock the door, and just walk around, you know– naked? "What are you talking about freaky-deek!?" They called me that. "What kind of fool are you?!" I want my house, and I want to walk around nekkid, I can do that. But in North Chicago, you could do it with style. You know? You could be what you want to be here.

When did you first come to North Chicago? 

I was born in Philpp, Mississippi. 1937. We came to North Chicago in 1938. I was just starting to walk, my mom said. My dad came, then I came with my mom.

My grandmother’s sister came first. It was one of those situations… she was walking out of a store and the local sheriff's wife was coming in… the lady got really angry… you know, called her the famous n-word, “Get out of the way!” And my great aunt is very Black. Anyway, she wouldn't get out of the way. So that's when they found out her husband was sheriff. They got the word through some folks that they were coming for her. Big Mama was married to a man named Joe, and Joe worked for the railroad. He would ride from Greenwood, Mississippi to Chicago and back. So when he found that out– they got her on the train with him and they came to North Chicago. Joe and her were pretty frugal. They saved their money. They bought a house on 22nd Street. It stayed in the family until maybe four years ago.  

Big Mama’s coming here was the opening up for all of the Griffins and the Longs and the Glovers. There's a lady down the line– down the line meant Lake Forest, Lake Bluff– they need a laundress. They’ve got somebody– they need a babysitter. They all started coming up here to work. 

My dad could do anything. He could fix anything. Loved my dad very much. In his first job, he helped them build a high school in Lake Forest. He loved to work. After that, he worked for Johns-Manville in Waukegan. His job was to load and unload asbestos and all of its byproducts. He would get home from work and be so covered with the stuff. We didn't have running water, but there was an outhouse. We had a big number three tub– a galvanized tub– and he would get in the tub and we would take our turns with the brush and the soap. My brothers had to get the lower parts, but I did his hair and his back and his arms. He stayed out there 30 years. They retired him at 58. Never missed a day. They gave him some kind of award. And then he died [from the] asbestos.

What was growing up in North Chicago like?

I went to Commonwealth School for first grade. We were living upstairs in the 1400 block of Elizabeth. But my mom got pregnant, and the landlord said we had to move. We moved to 2012 Argonne Drive, and I went to Lindbergh school for second grade. My dad met somebody who had that house for sale at 2117 Dickey. No running water, nothing, just a house. It wasn't even brick. He just wanted his own house. And I told you– he could to do stuff. We moved there and I went to South School. 

At that time, I think the colored kids– we were "colored" then– I think the colored kids, maybe there was nine of us out of 127 or something like that. We had kids from everywhere. My best friend, her parents and grandparents were from Greece. They had the grocery store on the corner of 22nd and Martin Luther King. And then my other buddy– her name was Helenka. She was from Switzerland. 

On Fridays at South School we had show-and-tell. Every week, the teacher would pick somebody. That's how we got to know how to pronounce the kids’ names, where they were from. We had Emily Iverson. Emily was Irish. The trauma came when the teacher said “Next Friday is Etties's turn.” I was the only colored in the room, and there were about 20 kids. And these kids are from different countries, and bilingual, and they can tell “This is our flag. And my parents came from Poland.” 

I came home and I told my mom that the next Friday is my day for show-and-tell. Where's our country? "Country!?” What country are we from? “From!? You're from Mississippi,” she said. That's not it, mom, that’s a state. I need to know our country we came from and what was our flag like. And she says, "I don't know any of that. You're from Mississippi." I didn't sleep for a couple of days. 

And then: I'm going to the library. I'm going to start at A and I'm looking in every book ‘til I find somebody who looks like me. God bless me, Africa starts with an A. It took me about three trips... I got into Africa, saw those people… It was just like God answered my prayers. My mom said “You're not African. You're not from Africa, you're from Mississippi!" But I knew I wasn't gonna get up there and not have nothing. 

So I wrote my report that I was from Africa, but it has so many countries, that we didn't have a flag because I didn't know which country in Africa we came from. The kids enjoyed it, and she gave me an A. I said, Ma, I got an A on my report! "What report?" Oh! I got it that time. She was about ready to knock me out. I was nine or ten when I did that.

And after graduating from high school? Did you have a plan?

I graduated on the sixth of June. And I was in San Antonio, Texas on the 11th, doing my basic training for the Air Force.

I'd already been over at Great Lakes with the Navy. This is when I was in high school. They had a work-study program. I had a friend named Gloria Valdez. She was the one that found out: if we could pass this test, we could get our classes in the morning and go work two or three hours in the afternoon.

I think I chose the Air Force mostly for the uniform and chance to fly– or something. All I can remember is that I didn't want the Navy because I wasn't going on those ships. I knew how to swim but I didn't want that. '55 was the first year– I was in the second integrated flight in the Air Force, because they used to just keep all the colored kids until they had enough to make the flight. I only stayed in the Air Force three years. 

Then I married my high school sweetheart. We had a boy and a girl. And then, he broke my jaw. He was a boxer. Every day I get off of work– he's sitting up side the main gate with this gun on the seat. “You're coming back or I'm gonna kill both of us, and I'm gonna kill the kids." I just let him have the house, the clothes, everything. I took my two kids, I got on the train and went to St. Louis with my dad's uncle. Worked there eight years, and transferred back up here. 

Then I went to work for Baxter. When I worked at Baxter, you could transfer and work wherever you wanted to. 

They called me Gypsy. That's what my family says; "Well, where are you going now, Gypsy?”

I went to LA next. I stayed there and bought a house. Four years, something like that. It was okay. But it was a little too city for me. 

After the west coast, I came back, but I had a cousin and he was in Vegas. He said, "You should come out here. There are jobs galore, Gypsy. Whatever you want.” So I went to Las Vegas. I bought a house, and I stayed there for years, and then my mom got to the point where she could no longer live by herself. I moved back and stayed with her up until she she passed. 

Then I went to Memphis.

It’s easy to see why your family called you Gypsy. Beyond the necessity of the situation with your ex-husband, where does your willingness pick up and go come from? Is it wanderlust?

What makes me a gypsy? I read. I've been inquisitive all my life. And I think that one of the things that started me out– was having to go to that library and finding out that we were African.  

I've had the opportunity to help a lot of people with the knowledge that I learned growing up in the city with so many different languages and lifestyles. My parents said you had to say good morning. And we had to learn that in Polish. We had to learn it in Greek. Because if we see the kid’s mom or grandma at the grocery store, you just you say Hello miss so-and-so. You say "Dziękuję." That's thank you.

Looking back over my life, I’ve just figured I was fortunate. My parents were able to let me go to school, let me do everything mostly I wanted to do as long as it was within reason. I could do different things that the other girls couldn't do, and that gave me the freedom to see a different kind of life. I feel like if it's something I want to do, I can try it.

I'm thinking about meeting people from all over the world, and all my buddies; all they could see is getting this house, getting this husband, having these kids– and I was wanting to see the Grand Canyon. I want to go see tallest tree or something. You know, God couldn't make this whole world for us just to be here in North Chicago. My next trip, I'm going to Jacksonville, Florida to see my niece. As soon as the cardiologist tells me this defibrillator is working right.

What do you say to a young person who thinks they’d like to “see the world” but maybe doesn’t have the confidence your parents helped instill in you?

If you want to dream, dream. The mind is a awesome organ. I talk with these kids and I say, what do you want to do? What have you thought about doing? What excites you? And then I try to give them the– whatever brought me to my conclusions in life. And then I try to tell them; a lot of times, you limit yourself. And I think for God to have created such a big world– and for you to stay in one little pocket of it.

I want everybody, I pray it, and I wish everybody had opportunity to just be what they wanted it to be. And be good at it. And be happy with it. And see where it serves just not them, but everybody. You know, you've got something? I don't think God has one soul that ever came here that didn't have somewhere or some thing, or some calling, some talent or something. Search for your talent. What are you good at?  You know, can you make a living at that? I try to just tell them that peace and happiness are two of the greatest feelings you'll ever have. Peace and Happiness.

This conversation has been edited and condensed.