Inette
I came here shortly after high school because there was no work in Birmingham. When they bombed the Baptist Church, it rattled the front windows in our house. There was a lot of unrest, and I knew my destiny was elsewhere. My uncle lived in North Chicago and sent me a ticket to take the Greyhound bus.
I fell in love with North Chicago, and I met my husband here. He was in the military at the time, but once he got out we were engaged and got married in ’68. We had five children; one son who was born first, two daughters, and a set of twins. A year after we were married we bought a house, and we’ve been here ever since.
My husband comes from a fairly large, pretty prominent family in the area; the Colemans. I have four brothers-in-law and one sister-in-law. His father was businessman. He had a lot of things going on: a landscaping business, he’d go south every year to get watermelons and bring them up and sell them, he had a little barbecue restaurant…
As a long-time resident, what do you think people should know about North Chicago?
I think it's a neat little town and the people are friendly. It's a nice community and I like the unity of it. I had thought at one point I wanted to move away, but that was just– I am going to stay here because I like it here.
All of our kids went to college and have degrees. They all wanted to graduate from North Chicago High School because that's where their dad, aunt, and uncles had graduated. We're proud of that.
I have a friend that I worked with– she was born and raised here, but they moved to Gurnee. She say negative things… I just had to talk with her. North Chicago is a good place to live, and to raise children. We're working on the school system right now, and that is coming along. And it's gonna be great again. I really believe that.
I see a shining star. I really do. In the 70s, and 80s a lot of caucasians moved out. They had a lot more resources than a lot of the people who migrated here. We did not have the resources or connections to the big companies. When they left, the big companies left along with them. I just thank God that Abbott stayed here. I worked with them for a while, but I also worked in Waukegan at Social Security for many years.
North Chicago has always been a place of migration and immigration, and now a growing Spanish-speaking community calls it home.
I think it's a good thing. I have neighbors next door that have been there for 25 or 30 years. They're from Belize. Across the street is an Hispanic couple; Puerto Rican. They're good neighbors. I love the diversity of the community. We can all learn from others.
From looking forward to looking within, what’s your greatest fear?
After my kids had grown and my husband had retired from ComEd, we purchased a truck. An 18-wheeler. This is something he wanted to do because his dad had an 18-wheeler, and he'd worked with him. So, he used to travel and I'd be home by myself. I was fearful. I tell you: I'd go downstairs with a knife and a bat [laughing]– making sure no one was in the house! It was a fear I got over with much prayer and supplication. I got over that.
The quiet and being alone would have been a very new experience after years of having a house full of kids!
Yes. Empty nest syndrome. I tried not to explain to him too much how I was feeling. He probably he would have come home, but he was enjoying himself on the road. I didn't want him to feel like he had to rush back or, you know… because he probably would’ve gone out and got me a gun!
We were married almost 50 years. He's deceased now.
Do you have advice for maintaining such a long marriage?
Honesty. Honesty is number one. Commitment. You must really make that commitment. You stick with it. Sometimes it's gonna be good and sometimes bad, but you can deal with that. And both people have to be committed. One can't do it. We had our ups and downs, but we were committed. Other than that, put God first, then you two second. That makes the triangle– and you’ll make it.
Your husband passed in 2016. Do you have words for someone experiencing that kind of loss?
There's a loneliness. I'm not one of those people to break down and cry and scream. I wanted to just be by myself, and that worked for me. For some people, they need someone around them, to comfort them. But ultimately you're going to have to deal with that grief yourself and just let it take its course.
There’s a sense that your husband is still very present for you. How would he describe you, the person you are today?
I think of him a little bit every day. He's always told me I'm too independent. So that would be first on this list. He was worried that when he passed; he told the kids "I don't want to leave your mom," because he didn't want to leave me alone. But he knew that ultimately I'd be okay. And I am okay.
What’s your greatest strength?
My faith in God.
And your greatest weakness?
We all have our weaknesses. But my faith is really… I trust God. And I have faith in him that he will ultimately take care of me and give me direction for my life. You know, the bottom line is that we love one another. And I try to do that. I love God and I love my neighbors.
…Oh, my weakness…you still waiting for that?
Or, any other closing thoughts– something about you, or about North Chicago?
I love this city, and I see it on the rise. And I believe we are on the cusp of something big.
This conversation has been edited and condensed.